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There goes 2019. Out of a spirit of perversity, and because I have a large and irrational dislike of New Year’s Eve, I chose to spend the 31st of December stone cold sober and went to bed well before midnight. This does mean that I get the mild but distinct pleasure of spending the 1st of January without a hangover. I doubt this is an omen and that there will be many fine and disgusting hangovers to come in 2020.
The only thing of any great personal significance to happen to me in 2019 was the discovery of a personal faith hitherto absent in my life. The journey from rabid atheist, through modern Satanism, paganism, chaos magick, and nihilism to something resembling an orthodox position on Christ, albeit one tinged with Gnostic mysticism, has been a strange old ride. All being well I should get confirmed in 2020 if I can keep my heterodox impulses in check.
I don’t expect 2020 to be much different in accidental detail to 2019 aside from becoming more sequestered from a wider world I find increasingly intolerable. I will continue to write prose, produce podcasts, and create unlistenable music. If I have one goal, creatively speaking, it’s to finish a longer project that I can shop around to agents. A secondary personal goal is to write more poetry which I find to be selfishly pleasing but also spiritually worthwhile. I’ve got the shape of a collection coalescing in my head, marrying some relatively formal poems on religious themes that I’ve already completed with some more modernist pieces which explore free verse and deal with more secular matters.
The only thing of any great personal significance to happen to me in 2019 was the discovery of a personal faith hitherto absent in my life. The journey from rabid atheist, through modern Satanism, paganism, chaos magick, and nihilism to something resembling an orthodox position on Christ, albeit one tinged with Gnostic mysticism, has been a strange old ride. All being well I should get confirmed in 2020 if I can keep my heterodox impulses in check.
I don’t expect 2020 to be much different in accidental detail to 2019 aside from becoming more sequestered from a wider world I find increasingly intolerable. I will continue to write prose, produce podcasts, and create unlistenable music. If I have one goal, creatively speaking, it’s to finish a longer project that I can shop around to agents. A secondary personal goal is to write more poetry which I find to be selfishly pleasing but also spiritually worthwhile. I’ve got the shape of a collection coalescing in my head, marrying some relatively formal poems on religious themes that I’ve already completed with some more modernist pieces which explore free verse and deal with more secular matters.
